Picture of the Day for 12/31/2011. So, how did I spend the last day of 2011? I spent hours reading Prophet's Prey- a book written by a private investigator about the Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints (FLDS). It's a fascinating topic and the book is a fascinating read. I tore myself away from the book long enough to go see Mission Impossible: Ghost Protocol for the third time with my sister and brother-in-law. I love that movie.
Picture of the Day for 12/30/2011. For the past few Christmases, my sister Paula has been giving me and my other sister Robynne CDs with recordings our family has made over the years (i.e., talks we gave in church, a recording we made for Paula's family when they were living out of state, etc.). This year's CD was a recording made over 20 years ago of me telling "The Infamous Organ Story." An unfortunate run-in I had with a church organ when I was approximately 20 years old remains the most embarrassing moment of my life. I tried to upload the recording to the blog, but the site won't allow me to post audio-only files. So, here's a recap of the story:
When I was a young woman attending the University of Utah, I served as an executive officer in Lambda Delta Sigma which is the Mormon alternative to the traditional Greek sororities nationwide. When I was in college, the University of Utah’s Lambda Delta Sigma organization consisted of approximately 10 chapters (each chapter functioned as a separate sorority).
My fellow executive officers and I were asked to speak in church one day at a local congregation. As the service was starting, I noticed there was no hymn book within reach, but there was an extra one relatively close by (as we were sitting up on the stand directly behind the pulpit) resting on top of the organ. I love to sing and figured I could sneak the few feet over to the organ to grab the hymn book without making a big production of it. In theory, my plan should have worked out, but my execution of the maneuver went horribly wrong as I failed to notice the organ was set into a depression and I ended up tripping. Even as I was tripping, it felt like time had slowed down enough for me to formulate a complex plan to mitigate the disaster. I thought to myself, "If I just reach out my hand to the top of the organ, I can stop myself from tripping." I reached out my hand, but unfortunately, I missed the top of the organ. Instead, my hand knocked over the stand holding up the organist's hymn book which caused the book to become a flying projectile.
At that point, I was thinking things couldn't get worse, but sadly they did. When I tripped over the organ, my high heel had unplugged the organ. So, here's the sequence of events. The music stand came down with a slam and caused the organist's hymn book to become airborne and then land on the keys. There was just enough power left for the crash to create a cacophony of discordant sound and then the organ went silent. This did not deter the organist who was in complete denial and continued to try to play the organ for a few moments before the sad reality of the situation set in.
The congregation (which was huge- there were about 200-300 people in attendance) was so stunned, it was if they were all holding their collective breath. I gave a little wave to the congregation, grabbed the hymn book I had sacrificed so much of my dignity to obtain, and then slunk back to my seat.
So, at that point I was thinking things couldn't get worse, but sadly they did. I had not only unplugged the organ, but I had managed to break it. I can still see in my mind's eye the three members of the bishopric on their hands and knees trying to fix the organ. It only took them about five minutes, but the meeting came to a complete halt during this time. It didn't help that I was sitting front and center on the stand for all the congregation to see during the five minutes of silence.
My fellow officers of course thought this was hysterical. During the remainder of the meeting, the group would frequently break out into a fit of silent giggles so the entire row would be shaking from all of the laughter.
The people who were NOT AMUSED by this incident were the national officers of Lambda Delta Sigma who just happened to be in attendance. Oops. Our group of executive officers for the University of Utah chapters was comprised of headstrong and quirky young women who definitely did not fit the mold of sweet Mormon girls. Consequently, we were never the national officers' favorite and my mishap did nothing to endear us to them.
On the other hand, the congregation could not have been nicer to me. After the meeting, several people came up to put their arm around me and tell me about their own embarrassing experiences.
Over the years, the story has reached legend status among friends and family. You have to admit- it is a fabulous story.
Picture of the Day for 12/29/2011. In Dante's Inferno, the gates of hell are inscribed with the phrase, "Abandon all hope, ye who enter here." This seems to perfectly describe the look on my niece Chantal's face in her driver's license photo- taken after several hours of waiting at the DMV in the middle of summer with no air conditioning while wrangling two small children. Definitely sounds like hell to me.
Picture of the Day for 12/28/2011. Technically, I forgot to take a picture of the day because I was busy finishing up the last of my holiday baking. So, as a placeholder, I'm including a picture of myself doing the "Cousin It" hairdo which involves wearing a pair of glasses over my hair that's been pulled in front of my face. This NEVER fails to amuse my nieces who all happen to be adults.
Picture of the Day for 12/27/2011. Tonight was the official Merrill Family Christmas Party. My niece Michelle brought her little dog Lemony who was struggling to make a break for freedom. Michelle's solution was to lift Lemony high above her head. Surprisingly, this worked. Lemony seemed quite content to view the proceedings from this vantage point.
Picture of the Day for 12/26/2011. Pictured above are just some of the Christmas treats I've received during the holiday season. I can't believe I'm saying this, but I think I've reached my sugar threshold which is saying something since sugar is my main food group (followed closely by Diet Coke). This does not mean I will forgo the treats. It only means that I will actually start pacing myself.
Picture of the Day for 12/25/2011. My niece Corinne HATES this Santa decoration. She finds it incredibly creepy. Sadly, she made the mistake of letting her family know this so they use the Santa to torment her. One Christmas morning, she woke up to find the Santa at the foot of the bed. Tonight, Santa was waiting for her in the shower.
Picture of the Day for 12/24/2011. Christmas brings out the child in all of us.
Example #1. My brother-in-law David's best friend Walt was in attendance at Christmas Eve dinner. Walt and David have been friends since they were kids as evidenced by the way they interact and the Christmas presents they gave each other. Walt gave David a "Who Farted?" calendar that came with sound effects. David gave Walt a a stuffed donkey that laughs hysterically when you press a button on its hand. As you can tell by the photo above, these normally very dignified men were delighted with their gifts.
Example #2. Earlier in the day, my nieces Rachel and Lisa engaged in a staring without blinking contest. I'm not sure who won, but I'll tell you this, if I had been playing I would have won. I'm an expert at this game.
Picture of the Day for 12/23/2011. I came across this photo of my grandmother Merrill welcoming her son (and my uncle) Wayne home from his stint in the Navy during World War ll. I'm about five years older than she was when this picture was taken. My mother always said that my father was a dead-ringer for his mother and I'm a dead-ringer for my dad. (It's kind of like an algebraic equation: if a=b and b=c, then a=c.) What do you think? Do I look like her? I don't think I do.
Picture of the Day for 12/22/2011. My friend Suzanne gave me this set of space flash cards for my birthday. When I told her that I was enjoying the cards and actually learning new trivia (i.e., the word astronaut means "sailor of the stars"), Suzanne sagely asked, "Can you ever really know too much about space?" Indeed, you cannot.
Picture of the Day for 12/21/2011. I took my cooking experiments (pecan clusters and a modified version of my chocolate chip cookies) to my sister Robynne's house to solicit feedback. Apparently, they were a success as evidenced by my niece Rachel (who is home for the holidays - yay!!!) taking the two-handed/double-barreled approach to eating the treats.
Picture of the Day for 12/20/2011. I tried a new candy recipe for pecan clusters that I found on the Food Network website. Not sure how I'm feeling about the results so I'll take them over to my sister's house tomorrow night to solicit what I hope will be her family's unbiased opinion.
12/19/2011. My sister Paula's kids have mounted a two-year campaign to have an authentic Dickens Christmas feast which naturally would include goose. As part of the campaign, Renee set up her laptop in the living room and had her mother watch an episode of Good Eats (from the Food Network) which provided detailed instructions for cooking a duck (a close cousin to the aforementioned goose). While it was a very entertaining show, Paula remains unconvinced.
Picture of the Day for 12/19/2011. We celebrated my great-nephew Ethan's 9th birthday this evening (one day early- his actual birthday is on the 20th). Readers of my blog are aware that Ethan's official title is "The Henchman." The nickname is so ingrained that when we sang Happy Birthday to him, instead of singing "dear Ethan," we all sang "dear Henchman."
Picture of the Day for 12/18/2011. Our church choir sang a very rousing version of Haydn's The Heavens are Telling for the Christmas program today. I enjoyed singing it so much that I've been listening to it on YouTube all evening. I love singing Christmas music- so much so that I even sing along (yes, out loud and in public) to the piped-in music playing in stores. It's too bad I don't have children since I could really embarrass the snot out of them.
Picture of the Day for 12/17/2011. Here is my home office which you can see doubles as my kitchen. Clearly, this is not an ideal situation. I'm living in a house that is 60 years old and built during a time when minimal electrical outlets were sufficient. And don't even get me started on the phone jacks. I have turned using extension cords into an art form.
Picture of the Day for 12/16/2011. My sisters sure have my interests pegged. As mentioned in a previous blog entry, my sister Robynne gave me a space shuttle paperweight for my birthday. (I'm saving my friend Suzanne's space gift to me for a later blog entry.) My sister Paula, knowing that I collect cookbooks, gave me this bicentennial edition of a First Ladies cookbook. It's a lovely collection of recipes and given my fierce sweet tooth, I'm naturally drawn to the desserts. I may have to start a separate blog to document my adventures in cooking with history's first ladies.
Picture of the Day for 12/15/2011. I attended the Dickens Festival (an annual Christmas event here in Salt Lake City) with my sister Paula's family. I think the highlight of the evening was seeing actual reindeer. I'm sure they are on loan from Santa.Paula convinced Corinne and Renee to pose in this sleigh. As you can tell, Corinne was NOT happy about it.
Picture of the Day for 12/14/2011. In 2002, I recorded my parents reminiscing about World War ll and their wartime experiences. I've been looking for this tape for years and finally stumbled across it. I did the goofiest dance of joy when I found it. What a treasure, especially now that both of my parents are gone.
Picture of the Day for 12/13/2011. My birds are chatty, especially when other people are talking. Some friends dropped by for a visit, but we couldn't hear ourselves over the sound of the birds chirping. While it's a sweet sound, it's not conducive to conversation. The birds were eventually banished to the kitchen where they appeared to be suitably chastened. I didn't hear a peep out of the them for the rest of the visit.
Picture of the Day for 12/12/2011. Um, do you think I have a slight Diet Coke addiction?
Picture of the Day for 12/11/2011. I attended the annual Christmas concert performed by the German Chorus Harmonie. It's a nice way to kick off the Christmas season. I've been attending this concert for the past few years, but this was the first time they they provided a printout of the lyrics in English which made the experience that much more enjoyable. It was nice to know what they were singing about.
You can tell my sister Paula is an experienced child wrangler. Her 5-year-old granddaughter Sadie was getting restless so to keep her distracted Paula waved Sadie's arms like she was conducting the choir. Worked like a charm.
Picture of the Day for 12/10/2011. After attending what is likely turning into an annual birthday breakfast celebration for myself and my friend Jenny at the Little America hotel cafe, my friend Suzanne and I browsed the hotel gift shops. We ended up spending the most time at a little clothing store that had several hats for sale. We had no choice but to try them all on. Suzanne and I vowed that someday we must host a tea party where the attendees are required to wear hats.
Picture of the Day for 12/9/2011. Oh man, I need this Fiat. It's my birthday tomorrow so someone should buy it for me. Just saying...
Picture of the Day for 12/8/2011. Technically, I did not take this photo, but it was too good to pass up for my picture of the day. My sister Paula's kids love to commit crimes against her quaint Christmas village. A couple of years ago, an angry village mob invaded the serene hamlet. This year, zombies are attacking. This is why I love my family.
Picture of the Day for 12/7/2011. I think this has to be one of the oddest photos I've posted on my blog. My sister and brother-in-law picked up a brass space shuttle paper weight at a local antique store for my birthday. (Yay for space memorabilia!) The gift is not odd, but the resulting tableau took a decidedly weird turn. The shuttle is surrounded by Christmas candles and in the background, if you look closely, you can see my nephew Robbie making a face.
Picture of the Day for 12/6/2011. According to my bank's website, I recently sent a $148 payment to "River Run Condom." Sadly, I was juvenile enough to be amused by this. I'm guessing $148 would buy a LOT of condoms. In this instance, however, the $148 paid for my monthly condominium HOA fee.
Picture of the Day for 12/5/2011. Today was Resume Day. I had composed a quick, high-level resume (my first in 20 years) a few weeks ago, but I needed to flesh it out to accurately depict all my work/accomplishments over the past 16 years. I loaded Microsoft Office to my laptop and then spent several hours poring over a 200-page time entry summary (encompassing several years) I had printed out before my last day of work. It jogged my memory about a lot projects I had forgotten about. After that, it took me a few hours to decide what items to include/exclude, how to phrase my bullet points, and how to organize my topics. Phew- at least I've got a good working draft. One of my severance benefits is a 3-month subscription to a career transition services company. One of the services they provide is resume review/critique. I'm hoping I can get their feedback on my resume draft ASAP since I have two interviews this week.
Picture of the Day for 12/4/2011. I spent the evening at my sister's house tonight. The post-dinner entertainment consisted of watching episodes from the 3rd season of Parks and Recreation on DVD. The show is very funny, but it's even more entertaining to watch my brother-in-law David when he's on a laughing jag. It's a sight to behold.
Picture of the Day for 12/3/2011. My two sisters and my niece Renee helped me pack up and clear out the last of my possessions from my condo today. (Yay for helpful family members!!) I'm hoping to put the condo on the market soon and get it sold.
During the course of packing, Renee was excited to encounter a shoebox full of loose change and volunteered to take it to a Coinstar machine. I was thinking I had about $50 in change, but it ended up totalling $191 dollars. Wow! I used the money to take everyone out for a really nice lunch.
Picture of the Day for 12/2/2011. Ever since I moved into my parents' house nearly 2-1/2 years ago, I've been using the stairwell as storage space so it was kind of like navigating an obstacle course going up and down the stairs. I finally cleared off the steps. I'm sure this is not scintillating news for my readers, but I'm excited about it. It's another small victory in my fight against the clutter.
Picture of the Day for 12/1/2011. I mentioned in a recent blog entry that I'm having wild dreams. They are continuing unabated. The other night I dreamed I got caught up in some shenanigans with Tommy Lee Jones (hence the photo above), Clint Eastwood, and James Garner. You may recall these three actors appeared together in the movie Space Cowboys, but in my dream (which had nothing to do with space or astronauts) they were involved in something much more dangerous and sinister.I also dreamed that a friend and I were participating in some German musical/theater production and we were required to make our own costumes. Christine from the Sister Wives show on TLC was involved. She was the best seamstress by far, but was totally embarrassed by the dresses she made. We all thought they were lovely.Weird...
Picture of the Day for 11/30/2011. As I mentioned in yesterday's blog entry, our entire office (consisting of 10 employees) was let go. Today was our last day. We had a nice farewell lunch and you can tell by the photo everyone was in good spirits. The mood changed around 5:00 p.m. when people started to leave. Then it turned into a big cry fest. We've all been working with each other for about 15 years so we are not only losing our jobs, but our daily association with people who have become like family.It took longer than I anticipated to clean out my email, my network files, and my office so I didn't leave until shortly before midnight. My dear friend Richard was working late as well. Just before we left, we spent a few minutes looking out the window at the Christmas lights on Temple Square. Not a bad way to end the last day at work.
Picture of the Day for 11/29/2011. So, I was at the deli located on the first floor of my office building picking up some lunch when the clerk asked me how work was going. I said, "Funny you should ask. Our entire office was laid off a couple of weeks ago and our last day is tomorrow." Poor young man- I think I fried his brain with this pronouncement. He was so stunned he didn't know what to say, but he certainly knew what to do. He reached into the pastry case and gave me a free brownie. That was very sweet. Chocolate always makes things better.
Picture of the Day for 11/28/2011. Well, I ain't getting any younger so I've decided to pull out all my books on writing fiction and actually read them rather than letting them collect dust. I aim to have an idea for a novel (along with a sample chapter or two) to pitch to an agent at Sleuthfest* in Orlando next March. If you have any ideas about what I should write, please let me know or else I'll have to fall back on my nieces' suggestion to write space/astronaut erotica.*Sleuthfest is an annual mystery writers convention hosted by the Florida Chapter of Mystery Writers of America.
Picture of the Day for 11/27/2011. I find myself buying things my parents liked. I guess it makes me feel like they're still around. My dad was a cookie fanatic- so much so that he would have put the Cookie Monster on Sesame Street to shame. I always used to buy these Danish cookies for my dad for Christmas and I couldn't resist picking up a tin this year.
Picture of the Day for 11/26/2011. I went to visit a friend who is in a rehab center recovering from double knee replacement surgery. I was highly amused by this get well card that my friend had received from a neighbor.
Picture of the Day for 11/25/2011. Every Thanksgiving I pick up a newspaper so I can peruse the Black Friday ads. I never do anything beyond that since I have yet to find anything worth getting up in the middle of the night and fighting the crowds to obtain.
Picture of the Day for 11/24/2011. Per my niece Corinne's request, the post-Thanksgiving dinner entertainment was THE duet- as performed by myself (top-hand) and my sister Paula (bottom-hand). This piano piece has such an infamous history in our family that "THE duet" is a sufficient identifier. It's a wild ride- both for the audience and the performers. The music is very difficult, moves at a swift pace, and is all over the keyboard. Also, as we reach the end of each page, I toss the page into the air with a flourish. Paula and I have been playing THE duet for approximately 30 years and have gotten progressively worse due to worsening eyesight and lack of practice. Words fail to describe how horribly we play which I guess is part of the charm of the experience. Tonight was our worst performance ever and that's saying something. Or, as Corinne might say, it was epic!
Picture of the Day for 11/23/2011. My great-nephew Dane celebrated his 14th birthday today. As you can see from his hat, he's ALL about Mario Brothers and his birthday was ALL about Mario Brothers merchandise. He comes by this honestly. In our family, we never just show mild interest in anything. That's far too tame. Instead, we have full-blown OBSESSIONS. My fanatic interest in space which leads me to spend thousands of dollars attending space conferences and acquiring astronaut autographs is a prime example.
Picture of the Day for 11/21/2011. I'm longing for a good night's sleep. So much so that I resorted to buying the magazine pictured above just for an article on how to accomplish that goal. I've reached a "certain age" where women typically become plagued with sleep issues. Not only do I wake up several times a night, but I have the most vivid dreams. Last night, for example, I spent what felt like hours riding a rickety old bicycle along canyon roads. After that, I dreamed that a mysterious Russian man gave me a powder blue quilted coat lined with lambswool which I passed along to a colleague's wife. (I'd pay good money to figure out the meaning behind that one.) By the time I get up in the morning, I feel like I've already had so many adventures that I'm already exhausted.
Picture of the Day for 11/20/2011. Joey the Beagle is really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really hoping my niece Renee will share her pie. Can you blame him? C'mon...it's pie!
Picture of the Day for 11/19/2011. I saw these Lord of the Rings Pez dispensers at a drugstore. It did my nerdy Lord of the Rings-loving heart good to see them. For any family members reading this blog, please note that I DO NOT need these for Christmas. Cute as they are, I'm trying to cut back on on all the useless knick-knacks in my possession, not add to them.
